Utility Sink

I went downstairs the other day to get my laundry out of the dryer.

Our laundry room has one of those large, plastic utility sinks that most apartment buildings have in the laundry room.

What most apartment buildings don't have however, is the maintenance man peeing into said utility sink.

I know they make that sink big for a lot of different jobs, but I'm certain that's not one of them.

"oh...sorry."
That's all he said. I didn't say anything and just got my laundry with my back to him so I could get out of there as fast as possible. I imagined his pee bouncing back out of the 18-inch deep sink, across the 15-foot room, and onto my freshly-dried laundry.

While I think that might be impossible, I'm no scientist. And since I couldn't be certain that his taco-flavored piss wasn't sprizting my GAP undies, I was pretty pissed myself.

I just gave him a dirty look that I hope said "this isn't a fucking ditch in Tijuana". In translation, it probably just came out "please piss right in the dryer".

The kicker? His kid was standing right there, learning how to do it up right.

Thirty years from now, his kid will be pissing in my kid's birdbath with a leafblower strapped to his back.