These shorts can only lead to trouble...

Suspicious shorts

So about a year ago, my mom bought me these shorts. They're just jean shorts. Not fashionable, but not unwearable either. There was something about them though...that put me off. I only wore them once in the past year. It was VERY low on laundry the other day (being unemployed keeps you plenty busy) and I put the shorts on. While I did laundry and surfed the net for jobs, I flipped on the TV. It was on FX, since Jami watches Buffy reruns religiously every morning while she gets ready. In the afternnoon, FX runs lots and lots of episodes of COPS. Holy crap. I've got "suspicious shorts", or "arresting shorts" or "poor crackhead shorts". Whatever they are, every other guy arrested on COPS is wearing these shorts. Am I going to get arrested wearing these shorts? Only time will tell. Now that I've noticed this, I only want to wear them that much more. I need to get an older, crappier car, have a tail light out, meth or crack on me, and no shoes.