Waiting For Hilton

The fact that Paris Hilton has a club named after her in Orlando was only a blip in National News . (There's a few goodies in the link which add to the comedy, go read it and I'll wait.)

She didn't put up any money, she didn't help design it, pick the music, hire the staff, design the logo, approve the location or anything else. All she did was party, be rich, and have a high profile.

I'd love to make all manner of jokes about Paris' contribution to the world amounting to, well, Rick Solomon's baby batter spraying all over her chest on the internet. But I won't stoop. I'm here to tell a story.

Club owner and professional son/entrepreneurial moron Fred Khalilian put up 3 million bucks of his father's hard-earned (?...I don't know how far back the legacy goes) money to renovate a large building in downtown Orlando in order to pinkify the joint into a place gaudy and tacky enough for Paris to call her own. He succeeded, and just in time! The renovation finished just as Ms. Hilton would be arriving the next day to open the club, oh Joy!

But Paris didn't show. Not for six hours. The word is that she was skiing in Europe and she lost her passport, got held up at the airport and missed her flight to Orlando. Fortunately (I guess) for club guests and the host, they were able to get her sister, Nicky (I'm not stopping to look up if she spells her name in some dumbass way) there before ALL the guests had left. To add insult to injury, there was a long list of promised celebs that were supposed to appear at the club's grand opening including everyone from Lindsey Lohan to Puff Daddy. The list ended up more like Paris Hilton's Lawyer to Joey Fatone.

It should also be mentioned that the grand opening to Club Paris cost 75 bucks for "regular folk" and VIPS could pay 400 bucks which got them a table, and access to the VIP area, where Paris and all her celeb friends would not be hanging out that night.
That was night one.

Flash forward about four months. The regular cover charge for Club Paris has dropped from 15 dollars to no cover. Drinks at Club Paris are FOUR for ONE until 9:30 on the weekends. I'm sure you think that's a mis-type. I'll say it again...FOUR for ONE DRINKS AT CLUB PARIS*. Needless to say, they're not doing well.

Additionally, Ms. Hilton was contractually obligated to appear at the club anywhere from twice a month to four times a year, depending on which source you believe. To the best of my knowledge she hasn't shown up once.

Currently, the rumors range from Freddy K suing Paris, to simply dissolving the partnership since she's done as much for the club as she has for the world.

In either case, I think the 4-month rise-and-fall story of Club Paris will (hopefully) mirror Paris' "celebrity" as well. Has anyone heard from Dennis Rodman lately?

*Since the announcement of four for one drinks at Club Paris, outings to downtown now consist of 1) get hammered at Club Paris for $6.00, then 2)go to the concert venue or hipster bar we normally go to.