Why was I not the size of the planet Mercury?

So on this diet, they key is very simply counting calories. It's a breeze. On days that I don't work out I eat 1500 calories. On days that I do work out, I eat 1800 calories. One day a week you get to "cheat", but I've kept my cheating pretty modest after the first cheat day.

There are a bunch of food items that quickly become staples because they're easy and the calories are printed right on the box. Lean Cuisine and other low-cal instant meals are such items. Soup is easy. Cup o' instant potatoes; 160 calories. Individual serving of applesauce; 60 calories. And so on.

Since there are these staples...you tend to eat a lot of the same things. This lead me to an online quest for a calorie counter for different places to eat.

In the search, I found Chowbaby.com

It has a calorie counter for quite a few fast-food joints. While I knew perfectly well that these places weren't by any means healthy, I was pretty surprised to see the astounding calorie count on fairly common orders.

I looked up a bunch of things I would eat in college without batting an eye (unfortunately, the female population of the Creative Arts Center wasn't on the list....BOO-YAAAA!)

For example I would split a large Pizza Hut Meat-Lovers Pan Pizza with one of my roommates. 1 slice of PHMLPP? 500 calories. I would have 3, usually 4 slices. Holy assclowns, why wasn't I the size of a fucking Buick?

Even in Florida I would occasionally get 3 double Krystal burgers (they're small!). 310 calories each. A 930 calorie lunch.

While I was quite the porker at my heaviest, I'm actually surprised that I didn't need a giant shoehorn to get my enormous ass into a car. I can't believe I could fit into a regular movie seat.

I've actually found a couple of fast-food things I'll be able to have even on my lowest calories days. However, it's a pretty sure bet that I won't be slammin down a Denny's Appetizer Sampler at 3am after hitting the clubs anytime soon...or ever.