A bear might shit in the woods, but it does wipe.

So have you seen the toilet-paper advertisement with cartoon bears? I THINK it’s for cottonelle. I could be wrong. At any rate, one of the bears wipes his ass with the toilet paper at the end of the commercial. I’m really jealous and impressed that they got away with this.
I bet the spitballing meeting at the ad agency went something like this;

Johnson: More toilet paper? Ugh.

Goldman: I know, but whatcha gonna do. We gotta make this sing!

Johnson: How ‘bout we have somebody actually wipe their ass for a change.

Goldman: You know damn well we can’t show somebody wiping their ass on TV.

Johnson: Fine, we’ll make it cute. A cartoon. A cartoon bear.

Goldman: There’s no way that’ll fly. They’re not gonna go for it.

Johnson: I bet you $1,000 I can get a bear wiping it’s ass on that spot.

Goldman: You’ve got yourself a bet.

And sure enough, the toilet paper people went for it. A bear slides a length of toilet paper sideways back and forth across his ass as cartoon characters would dry themselves back in the day.
Genius.