Boogidy boogedy boo!

So Bob Geldolf and Bono think that their no-money raising, narcissistic, megomaniacal vanity project Live8 INFLUENCED the leaders of the God-damned world to give more debt relief to Africa.


This, in my opinion, is every bit as crazy as somebody claiming to know the reincarnation of Vishnu is made of pudding and living in his cat's pants.

OK...in the sake of fairness...I think I'm all cool and stuff. I think I'm soooo clever, smarter than some of my bosses, creative, and I think I kick a little ass. I dwell on my strong points because I'm also a paranoid, nerdy, tubby guy.

Even taking into consideration how wicked awesome I think I am...I would never, ever, not even if super-smart, time-traveling, ruler monkeys from the future came and told me it was true, ever think the leaders of the world were taking my advice on foreign policy. I don't think they would take my advice on a good restaurant, much less how to run the freakin' world.

Yet, writing The Joshua Tree is apparently such a delusion-inducing experience that Bono believes Bush, Blair, Putin or any other world leader gives a rat's ass what he has to say. He and Geldolf are absolutely convinced that their concert influenced proposals at the G8 summit to raise debt relieve to Africa by fifty billion by 2010 or some other shit that's not going to happen.

First of all, it shouldn't happen. At least not until we get some bloody-ass revolutions throughout most of Africa and about 20 or 30 murderous regimes are no longer starving people to death in order to feed a few thousand mercenaries.

Secondly, it just won't happen. There's ALWAYS some sort of summit, peace accords, environmental policy meeting, or some other crap that world leaders get together and decide should happen....and it rarely does (which is probably about a wash as far as the state of the world is concerned...some of the ideas may have worked, and a lot of them, well a lot of them are like Oslo).

But NEVERTHELESS, dear readers....what, in the name of anything that's considered Holy, did Bob Geldolf and Bono do that would influence world leaders? They had a CONCERT! The money didn't even go to Africa, they weren't allowed!

I think I'm going to have a dance party to raise awareness for the administration to try and get conservatives into the newly freed up Supreme Court seats.
Then, when that happens I can say my dance party magically had something to do with it! Wheeeee!! I'm a fairlyland Kingmaker! They put me in magazines, and that means I'm important in every way possible!

Bwoo-hoooty hoooooo!!!