Titty Justice

This made me ball-ticklingly happy. (4.25.2007 story if newer one shows up).

I used to think Joe Francis was just a slimy douche. He tapes drunk girls in public flashing their boobies and makes many millions of dollars from it...slimy indeed.

It wasn't until around the time I read the article by Claire Hoffman that I realized he's a world-class shit bird.

I mean, even if I assume Hoffman had some sort of agenda before she wrote the article (and let's be fair, it's the LA Times), even if 20% of the article is true (and I believe much more of it than that), he deserves some serious prison ass-rape karma.

I know plenty of Club-goers that would drop Francis' name in order to get into VIP. It was something like this;

Me: Hi, are you interested in getting bottle service tonight?

RDB*: Naw bra, we just want to chill. Joe Francis is my man, I'll hook you up**. Can we just glide?

Me: You know Joe "Girls Gone Wild" Francis?

RDB: Yeah bra, can we get in?

Me: Well, usually it's about 50 bucks for three people to get in, so for you it's 100.

RDB: Naw man, that's fucked up! (walks away)

* A free coffee or drink to the first person that tells me what RDB stands for.

**I never really knew what I was going to get "hooked up" with. Was I going to get a pile of free pornography? A hat and t-shirt? A 19-year old girl doing a sad and reluctant lap dance for me?

Shotgun Post

I haven't posted in a little while, mostly because of my new gig. It keeps me pretty busy through the week, which is when I usually post.

I celebrated a tiny bit this weekend with my wife and some other people marking my first free weekend in LA, as I've quit the club.

That's right, no more Saturday-night Douchebag conventions for me. I had a little bit of anxiety over quitting since that job saw me through a lot during my first year in LA. But I'm fairly confident that I'm not going to need it any more.

Yes, the money was really, really hard to walk away from. The club made it a little easier on me since they're re-doing the VIP section. The method by which I made 60-70% of my tips is getting taken over by the box office, so it was going to hit me and the other VIP host very hard.

So, with a much better TV credit under my belt, and having reached near exhaustion with the club people, we parted ways.

The celebration mostly consisted of fun juice, the UFC, and a viewing of GRINDHOUSE.

While I made a couple good predictions on close fights on Saturday, I was totally caught off guard by Koschecks's barely-win over Diego Sanchez and FLOORED by Serra's TKO win over GSP. This makes for a really interesting welterweight puzzle to be sorted out by Dana and the matchmakers.

I HOPE Koscheck's W won't be an issue. Diego didn't really participate in the fight, but neither did Koscheck. A single solid punch and one good takedown don't qualify as an asskicking. As the recipient of several, and deliverer of the occasional asskicking, I can tell you that was no asskicking.

And the final huzzah of the weekend was GRINDHOUSE. Long story short, I was surprised how much less I liked it than I anticipated. It seemed like an easy target to hit, yet Rodriguez missed even with of a non-stop shotgun approach and Tarantino was too self-indulgent. And this coming from a guy who likes Tarantino being indulgent.

This doesn't discourage me from high hopes for INGLORIOUS BASTARDS. We'll see.